You Know What The Holidays Need? More Of This.

"So tell me all about it," she asked while sprawling her legs on my couch, expectant eyes smiling at me.

"God," I began. "It had been a long day..."

Unlike most weekends filled with dark rooms and things said we'd hardly remember come Monday, I'd resorted to descending to reality for a few days of sobriety and reading in bed. We made plans to see each other that night, the sporadic frequency of our times together as erratic as we both were. Penelope had been in my place for about an hour when he arrived with a bottle of wine. Initially I'd resisted to drinking at all but when in Rome...

We sit outside and open the bottle, his mischievous grin shining through every time he offers a joke or remark. As usual he charms the wits out of people he's never met, and when he steps away to the bathroom Penelope is convinced I must marry him. I dismiss her with a laugh and chalk up her naivete to the cabernet flowing through her veins. After finishing the wine and downing some nasty clear liquid a friend brought back from Peru we decide to go to his place, where his roommate is hosting a small get together.

Cassie raises an eyebrow and cocks her head off to once side. "Hold that thought," she says, going to my liquor cabinet and pouring herself some of that Peruvian liquor in a shot glass. "You're right," she winces. This is pretty nasty. Continue."

"We drive off in two cars, Penelope's and his..."

When we arrive there's only beer and we're too lazy to make a wine run so that's all there is to it. There's a taxidermied animal in his living room which he sets on the floor to my horror, and my dog finds completely amusing. We're laughing hysterically as she sniffs and examines the dead body from all angles, possibly wondering why it won't play with her. I realize how disturbing this must sound to an outsider but trust me, it was hilarious. Things are normal as we huddle around the television and discuss sports and better days gone by. No mention of our previous close encounters nor the people we're both dating. It's natural. Casual, if you will. I feel fine with it.

Midnight rolls around and I tell Pe it's time for last call. We finish our beers and get up to leave when she makes a beeline for the bathroom. He approaches slowly, looking down at me and placing his face dangerously close to mine as he says, "I don't want to impose... But would you mind staying a while longer and having some wine?"

The answer was yes. We decide to buy a bottle as soon as Penelope leaves but when she does, the door locks behind me and drinking is the last thing on my mind. As we're standing in silence at the entrance hall he says, "So do you want me to get that wine?"

"Not really," I reply, offering nothing more as I stand there.

"Um, what do you want to do then?"

"Let's see," I looked up at him. "I have a few things in mind."

"Oh my God, what did he do?!" Her eyes wide as saucers couldn't contain her excitement. "Tell me!"

"I guess I figured he'd laugh and we'd buy the wine..." I continued.

He grabbed my shoulder and pushed me hard against the wall, kissing me without any preamble or forewarning. I kissed him back, the urgency of the moment trumping any possible reservations we might've had about what was to go down. Hands everywhere, we stumble towards his room, lips separating only to gasp for air or peel off our shirts.

As soon as the door closes we're on the bed, clothes off in sixty seconds, bodies together in less than that as he struggles to find the necessary safety measures in the dark. There's no hesitation in the way he makes love, no apologies for being aggressive. The bite and nail scratch marks left behind when we're done remind me of a cat fight, if cat fights were enjoyable, that is. I finish surprisingly early and him not long after. A part of me is convinced I'll wake up at some point, but I don't.

"So then what did you do?"

"Nothing," I said. "We laid together in silence for a while and then I got dressed and asked him to take me home."

She wags her finger at me and gives me the you're-always-going-to-be-alone look, "Why would you do that?"

"Because this is what happens when friendship lines are blurred to the point where no one thing can bring them to clear definition again."

She exhales loudly and finishes off her Peruvian fire. "Well maybe you should do something about that, buddy..."

"Maybe I should," I reply.

But I won't.