If you unfollow me as a result of the following video, I will come after you with the bloody jaws of life, a secret torture device I've invented for the easily offended. I swear my boobs don't look that terrible/lopsided or that I say "um" that often in real life.
Monday
Point Of Insertion: Part I
Sometimes in order to understand certain things, you need some direction. This is the case with tomorrow's post, an anecdote about my traumatic first-time experience using a tampon at the ripe old age of twenty-five.
If you unfollow me as a result of the following video, I will come after you with the bloody jaws of life, a secret torture device I've invented for the easily offended. I swear my boobs don't look that terrible/lopsided or that I say "um" that often in real life.
If you unfollow me as a result of the following video, I will come after you with the bloody jaws of life, a secret torture device I've invented for the easily offended. I swear my boobs don't look that terrible/lopsided or that I say "um" that often in real life.
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38 comments:
Oh dear God...don't tell me you left the applicator in??? This is why O.B. tampons are the best--no applicator, no waste (or confusion)!
Also, one of the other "how to put in a tampon" videos that shows up after yours has a very graphic screenshot. *shivers*
So glad to know I'm not the only girl who didn't start using tampons right off the bat.
Well, that was . . . informative. Can't wait to see what this is leading up to!
or you could try out a diva cup. but if you're only now learning to use a tampon, maybe you're not quite ready for the cup...
i look forward to tomorrow's post!
TB: Ding ding ding! Exactly.
J. Day: You are not alone ;) That sounded weird.
J. Franklin: I'm glad you were amused. Headed somewhere fun, promise.
Sherilin: A Diva cup? What is THAT?! No no. I know how to use tampons now. Just a bad first experience, is all.
My vagina is cringing for you! OH MY GOODNESS! I'm terrified for tomorrow and want to send your lady parts an ice pack and flowers!
I was also petrified of using tamps before reaching my 20's when i figured if your hooha's able to do the deed surely a tampon can't be that uncomfortable...
Let me just say applicators would have been very helpful along with some guidance on the correct position & angle for insertion.
You would not have wanted to be a fly on my wall.
Needless to say they were my last resort for a very long time :/
Well, content aside (late tampon user here too) you look SKIN-NEEE in that dress!! You should wear it every day! You should wear it out at night! You should buy it in every color! I love the belt, it makes you look very waist-y and SKINNY! Congratulations on the diet - we all know the camera adds 10 lbs so you must be doing something right!
PS - Anonymous must have Ebola with death on top because I can't believe s/he hasn't commented on this one!
I'm not able to watch the video (crappy internet), but I can imagine the sheer terror it might inspire in some. The first time I ever used a tampon (mid-teen years), it was applicator-less & scared the shit out of me. Thankfully, practice makes perfect so I'm quite fine now. However, I will still only resort to tampons if I absolutely "have" to. Pads work fine for me, thanks muchly.
I would have commented sooner but after watching that atrocious video I almost had a breakdown at the thought that people consider that to be entertainment and look up to such a charlatan. Luckily I was able to look within myself and have a heart to heart talk with Jesus and He left me with the feeling that everything was going to be ok and that I was on the correct path.
I taught my friend how to use tampons when we were 13. I had forgotten all about it until she got very drunk at her wedding and announced it to everyone there. It's great when you don't know anyone at a party and then they all know you THAT way.
LMFAO... I'm super excited and will watch the vid when the kidlet is not within listening distance!
First, what a pretty ring you were wearing! Second, I've never been able to use tampons because I cannot get over the fear of inserting it into my vagina. Bleh! And third, informative video. hahaha!
Anonymous, you know Jesus is imaginary, right? He died a couple of thousand years ago, so if you're having conversations with him 'within yourself', you very likely forgot to take your meds today.
lol that was good. I didn't start till I was in my late 20's as well. A menstrual cup is great. It's like a tampon but it's reusable and the blood pools in the cup not absorbed like a tampon, you dump the blood wipe or rinse clean then reinsert. Good for the environment and good for you. Plus way cheaper in the long run. I have a one but not the diva cup.
Really curious about tomorrows post now.
Oh I should add if you want search on youtube for menstrual cups. Lots of info.
And what path would that be anon?
The one that takes you on a long walk off a short precipice I hope.
One word
MOONCUP!
The reusable menstrual cup.
Um ... like ... um ... how many times did you say "um" ?? I ... like forgot to ... um ... count the "ums.
A diva cup is this somewhat flexible cup you stick up your hooha to collect the menstrual blood. And then when it's full you dump it out, clean it and stick it back it. A lot of people like it.
And Homg I had a terrible experience when I first used a tampon. The should really put detailed instructions on the package for people who use it for the first time.
my own little educational blurb about the diva cup. same thing as a moon cup.
http://laughingmyabsoff.blogspot.com/2011/08/shes-green-diva-now.html
I first started using tampons in 9th grade when it was a "either use a tampon or fail pool class" situation. It was a little scary, but I got over it. My sister, however, still refuses to use one. Somehow, she never has had to miss out on stuff...even vacations. I don't know how she's gotten that lucky. Maybe I should refer her to your video...
Also, these "diva cups" sound super gross...what do you do when you're in a public restroom? *shudders*
Ooh, so Red DOES mean go. And all this time I was thinking it was just a title.
i love the 'cheap cardboard tampon' vs. 'expensive plastic tampon' debate. ALSO glad you went with vajayjay to describe the area of import. ALSO ALSO i thought i was the only person who referred to tampons as 'filled to capacity'. you have just validated me and i love you more for it.
OMG ALSO AGAIN your boobs look great and i love your ring! and i haven't had any diet soda yet today- no i'm serious, i'm trying to cut back so all i've had is slim fast and water but seriously? it might as well have been a fuckload of caffeine because i feel pretty wired.
NO I FORGOT i have another ALSO. diva cup, moon cup, instead - whatever brand name you buy it under, they. are. awesome. if you are comfortable with reaching up in your vajayjay twice a day, they are totally worth a try.
Uhhh.
Well I suppose that is lesson learned.
Thanks Annah, I always wanted to know how those things were used and now I know.
Odie
Mija the first thing I did today was smoke a bowl while watching your little video here....
I wonder what kind of day I'm going to have now....
Also: you forgot to mention how much easier it is to get the tampon in if you raise one leg by putting your foot on the toilet of the edge of the shower.
Also: why did you wait until you were 25?!?!?!
http://arealgoodblog.blogspot.com
I promise everything will make sense tonight. Thanks for watching the video and I'm glad to know I'm not the only one with horrific experiences. Also, this whole diva cup has me intrigued but, I don't think I will try to insert yet another foreign object in there (that sounds terrible but yeah).
Ms. Co-Dependent: The funny thing is I don't think I've ever used a tampon when going to the beach or the pool. If I have my monthly visitor, I just try to avoid that altogether.
Steph: You are HYPER HYPER today girlfriend! Thanks for the love.
Charles: I will explain tonight on why I waited so long. And my first experience validated that I was terrified for good reason.
My Ma - (back in her day they were plastic, but cardboard) left the applicator in all day - is this where this is leading?
Believe it or not I discovered how great tampons were at 15 and then told my mother about them. I wasn't about to have to stop swimming or wear those god awful pads to gym class. Once Mom tried it, she was sold. She still tells people this story at 86 years old.
I love all of this. But what I really want to know is how many men followers you lost today? They are such titty-babies about menstruation. Like we DO IT TO THEM on purpose or something LMAO!
When I got my first period, my mom asked me, "Do you want to use pads, or the things you stick up inside you?" Yeah.
Also, as soon as you mentioned tampons, I KNEW that the Diva Cup Army would swarm the comments. I have one word for the Diva Cup: Blleeeeccccccchhhh.
women do this?! lol jk. dont trust anything that bleeds for days and doesnt die, that always comes to mind haha i keed i keed
Umm?Flushing those are a plumers nightmare.nice nails?hope this is going somewhere...
I always called the piece that you push to push the tampon inside a plunger... is that right? am I alone here?
When I had my first period at the ancient age of 14, my mom asked me if I wanted to use a pad or a tampon. I was scared to try the tampon so I asked for a pad. After an hour of having that gross, soggy pad between my legs I went back to her and asked for tampons. I read the instructions on the back, inserted the tampon, and I haven't ever looked back. Best. Invention. Ever.
When I was 17 my 13 year old cousin went on a 3 month camping trip with me and my family. Her period came a week after we started, and we couldn't do anything fun (read: hang around the lake beach in our swim suits scoping out boys) because she was afraid of tampons. When the next month rolled around and she was on her period again, I told her she'd better figure out how to use it pronto or I was going to ditch her ass. I gave her the box and instructions and told her to get at it. She fumbled around a bit and then cried and said she didn't understand how to do it. I volunteered to go into the stall and help her but she wasn't having any of that. So instead, I had to stand outside of the stall in a campground restroom and describe to her what she needed to do...in graphic detail. Hoo boy was that fun. But she learned. I think she was to afraid of me not to. :-)
@chemgirl - I call it a plunger too. You are not alone.
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