Because it's summer time and I'm sure funds are limited, lots of the parents in my current place of employment have been bringing their kids to work in an effort to save some moolah (or keep their sanity at the expense of other co-workers, I can't really tell just yet).
At any rate, one of the little kiddies has taken a liking to me and follows me around the office like a lost puppy on a rainy day. On Friday, he finally braced himself full of courage and asked me the following questions.
Boy: Sooooo... Are you married? I don't see a ring on your finger.
Me: Nope. Not married.
Boy: Engaged?
Me: No, child. No ring, remember?
Boy: Well you have to have a boyfriend at least, right?
Me: Um, no. No boyfriend.
Boy: So like, you're all alone? Just you and your dogs?
Me: (Feels herself shrinking in the presence of this pre-pubescent child). Correct. Just me and my dogs.
Boy: (Takes a minute to reply) Well that must suck.
At any rate, one of the little kiddies has taken a liking to me and follows me around the office like a lost puppy on a rainy day. On Friday, he finally braced himself full of courage and asked me the following questions.
Boy: Sooooo... Are you married? I don't see a ring on your finger.
Me: Nope. Not married.
Boy: Engaged?
Me: No, child. No ring, remember?
Boy: Well you have to have a boyfriend at least, right?
Me: Um, no. No boyfriend.
Boy: So like, you're all alone? Just you and your dogs?
Me: (Feels herself shrinking in the presence of this pre-pubescent child). Correct. Just me and my dogs.
Boy: (Takes a minute to reply) Well that must suck.
Whatever. He knows nothing about anything.
36 comments:
That's the problem w/kids. They are taught that life's goals are to get married and have kids...
society sucks.
AmberLaShell Rants <-- Click Here
Then you told him to get away because he was scaring away potential customers. Who lets their kid hang around a whore, anyway?
Hey anonymous why don't you go pull down your pants and play with your asshole.
Only a two bit douche bag who lives with his mom hides behind "anonymous".
Oh and Anna, don't worry about the kid, they don't know any better.
:(
Funny for a boy to say that. I mean give him less than 7 years and he'll be all FOR your position.
But you gotta love how blunt they are. It's like an ax to the neck that doesn't go all the way through.
Been a while, there Annah. Have had Mama drama of my own... anyway, 1)Cheer up. & 2)You're right.
1) You have a job. You looked cool enough & nice enough for your karma to attract a comment from a young person, which nowadays is like best friends... and you got a blog post out of it. You've made lemonade outta lemons... now go put some vodka in it in celebration, and go kick anonymous' ass... and
2) Yes, the kids at work thing has become popular... according to my partner.
Peace out, and chin up... I'm about to apply a Sav-A-Lot for a job... Peace & Love...
~ @thestorysmith
AmbertLaShell, is so spot on. However, I would make a tiny correction: "society (SOMETIMES) sucks".
Interestingly, long term "happiness" studies show that having children is not a necessary requirement for such. Parenting can of course produce joy, but can also easily produce the opposite for reasons too many to list.
But your topic was marriage (not reproduction) and that one is a mixed bag.
Nosey little booger.
Over the weekend my 6year old nephew found photos of me taken at a special effects make up tutorial wherein I was made to look bruised and have a broken nose. I tried to explain to him that its just make up and that's what they do with people in the movies.
His reply was "but you still look like you have black eyes today" - I was going for a minimal make up look that day.
Needless to say I wont be doing that again.
Only kids and the elderly can get away with being so blunt without getting assaulted. I feel your pain.
Over the weekend my 6year old nephew found photos of me taken at a special effects make up tutorial wherein I was made to look bruised and have a broken nose. I tried to explain to him that its just make up and that's what they do with people in the movies.
His reply was "but you still look like you have black eyes today" - I was going for a minimal make up look that day.
Needless to say I wont be doing that again.
Only kids and the elderly can get away with being so blunt without getting assaulted. I feel your pain.
At least once a month my 5 yr old niece asks me where my husband is, or why I don't have a husband, or why I don't have children, or why my family is so small. I used to get upset too, until I realized she watches Go, Diego, Go every day and just assumes everything comes in pairs. Now I tell her she's my family and I'm counting on her to feed me when I'm old so she better hurry up and learn to read. That shuts her up pretty quick ;)
You don't need a kid's approval to be happy, or anyones, for that matter. Just keep being you, and work it.
I try not to talk to children because they are evil and have a magical capability of making you want to kill yourself
Heh. Yeah, it's like when I spend time with my seven year old goddaughter. I have to brace myself for the questions. In her case she's so adorable I don't mind so much.
I am with Oilfield Trash on that scum bag no name. Such a jerk, his mama should take his computer away for a month.
I also agree that kids are being educated to see things far different that we ever did so I would not worry about anything coming from a teen or younger person.
You will always be special to me girl.
Tell him what time he had to go to bed the night before and what he had for dinner. Then say "well that sucks because I stayed up all night playing video games and had ice cream for dinner".
I feel you. When I was 13, two kids questioned if I was a boy or a girl. Yeah, still got small boobs and still remember that event. Bastard kids.
should have sprayed his face with water like they do to cats. bad little boy, bad. then hit him on the nose with a rolled up magazine lol
Sounds like Beiber is just waiting for his gonads to drop before he makes a play for you.
Kids suck anyhow so who the fuck cares - you shouldn't. I'm sure he'll grow up to be a lame emo bastard. Kids shouldn't be at the workplace no matter what, and if they MUST.. then the parents should watch over them, it's not your job.
You: "So, have you had sex yet?"
Kid: "No, I'm only twelve..."
You: "Oh. Well, that sucks."
ha HA! Who feels bad now???
Hard. Everything is SO hard! Hard Hat, Hard Water, Hard Head, Hard Charger...HARD!!!
Damn kids. What do they know. At least you know you were probably the topic at his dinner table that evening! When you're at the famousity stage, he'll rememeber when! Love ya sweetie!!!
I do not have children nor do I want to they are highly overrated not to mention leak from all ends so pass.
Oh and Lost In Idaho rocks
Sounds to me like the kids got a little crush going on.
Why else do males (of any age) notice the lack of a ring ?
Katsicles: That's terrible! I would've sprayed him with water, like Rommel said.
Lost: Your comment had me cracking up at the office. THANK YOU.
Jessica: I'm at that point in my life where the biological clock is ticking and I'm questioning whether I want to have any. And if I do... Would it be terrible to hjave just one?
Dirty cowgirl: Yeah... He totally has a crush on me. But the look on his face was priceless. Like "Oh, poor you."
Ow...just...ow.
On the other hand, it sounds like you missed a perfect opportunity to have a heart-to-heart about the concept of the booty call.
Ooh... Burn! Kids have a way of knowing exactly where to stick that knife in.
Obviously that child was just waay too introspective. Next time you see him just get him all jacked up on sugar and caffeine.
Then he won't be able to form 2 coherent sentences much less question your fate.
Oh Honey. I know the feeling. Kids are way too blunt (and wrong) for their own good/health, part of the reason I stopped teaching haha!!
In the last six months I have broken up with my live-in BF of 8 years and lost my job. Needless to say people felt more pity about the break-up. Financial security? Who needs it?! No biggie! But you're almost 30 and you don't have a man??? WHAT??? Or, wow! 8 years in a relationship and NO KIDS??? Whats wrong with you? Poor baby!!
It's cool. I've learned that my path doesn't have to mirror anyone else's and besides, the divorce rate is so high because people get married for all the wrong reasons. I'd rather be single and pitied for making the choices that were right for me.
Let's get together and toast to having the big cojones to create our own paths!!
Now if only I can get my aunt to stop praying for my uterus... LOL
My reproductive years passed by quickly after my divorce and now as I approach 50 I am LOVING my childless life...friends, travel, having spending money, etc. I get my "kid fix" through friends, neighbors and other family members. It used to bother me when I was younger and now I THANK GOD EVERY DAY when I hear about all the problems people have with their kids. Call me selfish, but call me HAPPY! :)
lmao! kids are too funny!
hahahahah this exact scenario has happened to me. gotta love kids.
...and the single life their presence only further validates ;)
xo
v
What's wrong with dogs?
In my life they gave me unconditional love and you could always tell when they did something wrong. Unlike many people I know.
Just know that the following comment means A LOT more than it seems because I haven't commented on a blog in, like, weeks:
LOLOLOL.
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