Me: (raises eyebrows) What the f*ck for?
Gerry: To get abs. Duh!
Me: When was the last time you went to the gym, Gerry?
Gerry: Last week. (hesitates for a moment) Last year, okay. But if I had an ab lounge I could do them right here, in the comfort of my own home. (gestures to his living room which is currently lacking a coffee table and has enough space for a little party of twenty in the center)
Me: So how exactly does this ab lounge thingie work?
Gerry: It's simple. You just sit on it and grab on to the sides and lean back. Kind of like if you were stretching really well, then you come back up as if doing a sit up. The fact you're off the floor gives you a lot more *range*, making your abs work harder and smarter.
Gerry: Maybe.
Two week later...
It's a Thursday night and Gerry invites me over to see his new ab lounge chair. I throw on some jeans and make the twenty minute drive south to observe the mighty machine in all its glory. As usual, Gerry forgets to lock his front door and I walk right in. This is the scene I'm faced with when I enter the living room:
32 comments:
I hope it's at least comfortable!
Maybe the ab lounge cancels the beer intake?
Then again, maybe not.
Heh. Yeah. That's why I could never work or work out at home. Home is where all my neat toys are. As well as my TV. If forced to choose between a:) boring old work, or b:) painful and exhausting exercise, or c:) a House marathon on USA Network, guess which one I'll pick, every time? At least Gerry is actually using the thing. Kinda.
You can't say he's not using it. Good ole' Gerry!
Haha. That is awesome! That would so totally be me...if I could afford the Ab Lounge.
lmao i luv the surprised look on his face. i totally need the ab lounge so i can concentrate on getting my beer belly at just the right size lol
That's probably more than what I'd use it for, and it's better than piling clothes on it, I guess... LOL
AmberLaShell Rants
I dont know... his abs looks pretty good to me! ;)
LMAO!!!!! Your illustration is awesome, but else did he do? (Like did he get up quick or just sat there?) Too funny
MJ: It was super comfortable. Those inventors know *exactly* what they're doing.
Danger Boy: Not.
Jules: Gerry is the man with the beer plan!
Rommel: You out of all people do not need the practice.
Amber: That would be my use for it too.
Ang: Trust. They're not good.
Yaimy: He just sort of shrugged. And kept on drinking his beer with this little smile on his face. It was hilarious.
Lots of lounging, not a lot of abs. Or ab-bing? Can ab be a verb?
I bought the 'ab roller' back in the 90's when it was 'the newest cool thing.' What a waste of $60... and what an ugly shade of purple...
At least his contraption doubles as a chair. Which means he's using it. :D
It would probably be very interesting to know how much money has been spent on exercize equipment that maybe was used one time and then became something that just stays in the way.
So funny! In college we used it as a chair too. So much for working out on it. Mr. wants to buy one for our house, but I am saying NO to it. Just a waste of space. Love that he was drinking a beer with it. Brilliant.
The beer makes it kinda counter-productive lol
hahaha I love the expression!
he should get a treadmill and then you and he can "work-out" together over margaritas or vodka or something! haha!
Lost: Abbing sounds pretty good ;)
Odie: I bet it's millions.
Mrs. Monologue: just show this post to the Mr. He'll understand why it's a no go.
Poke the Rock: That was exactly what he looked like. Like roadkill right before it's hit. Tragic.
Awwsumkitteh: Just a tiny bit.
Yvonne: No "working-out" with Gerry. lol. Just friends.
I'm pretty sure laying down on my sofa works out my hamstrings. Or my biceps. Whichever, I don't really remember.
Hi from a new follower - love your blog.
I once spent £150 on an eliptical (?) trainer.
It lived in my bedroom and ended up becoming the most expensive clothes hanger I ever bought.
And another piece of excercise equipment bites the dust! I would like to have the money spent on equipment that ended up in not being used in a 5 year period. I could live in comfort with it.
This is why you should have convinced him to get the flat-board one (I forget what it's called) but if you don't balance on it, it flips you upside down. Think of it, Gerry would spill the beer and really think about using the thing for its intended purpose...
Ava
Awesomeness !!! However
DO NOT go work out with Gerry
Less than 2 Months
p.s. you have an award waiting for you over at my place...
http://bit.ly/k4KPRl
Haha that's like me with my new treadmill. I told my mother we had to get the big one so I could run on it. After five months, I've used it maybe ten times and I only walk briskly on it. It's now mainly used as a nightlight(because I leave the screen on) to find the fridge in the middle of the night and as a clothes hanger.
Was he at least wearing sweatpants? Because I'm pretty sure that counts for something...
Okay, I know I should've commented before, but I always have to get used to things before I can say something or else I'll feel out of place all like, "Hey, I found you five seconds ago, love me!" And then if I end up leaving after all I feel like an asshole and that is just totally avoidable if I go all creepy and lurk for a while instead.
ANYWAY. I found your blog probably not even a week ago and have almost, almost read all of your posts. Loving the blog. :)
Well I must say those things never work, especially chair work outs in your own home. I wouldn't be surprised if you do a post about him bringing it out to some event like a football or baseball game. You know pre-game lounging before the actual game in the same position as you've just drawn.
At least he's sitting at a some-what healthy angle? I read this totally awesome/kinda scary info graphic about the dangers of sitting up straight. http://dailyinfographic.com/sitting-down-is-killing-you-infographic
I would love to actually meet a real person who has used a gadget to workout on a consistent basis!
Kev. D: Definitely hamstrings. I'm sure.
Barb: You and Odie said the same thing!
Ava: That sounds like some mean machine! How rude. How dare it flip me upside down as I try to drink my beer? Big no no.
Honna: Bahhahahah. "DO NOT work out with Gerry." I promise. No working out with Gerry until after July. Working out = Drinking beer and watching re-runs.
Rebekah: Our treadmill has a sad and lonely life in my mom's garage. Every time I see it, I feel nothing but gult.
Opto-Mom: He was wearing jeans. Don't think he was ready for his grand demonstration when I walked in.
Frackentay: Your comment was the sweetest. And let me know what happens when you do see Water for elephants.
Confessions: I seriously think some of those things *do* work. My dad had an ab roller and I used it all the time for about two months and good Lord! I looked like a Victoria's Secret model. Then I forgot about it and gained like 40 pounds and looked like a Lane Bryant model. I love food too much (plus I'm lazy).
Leah: The dangers of sitting up straight? What's next, water is bad for you!? I can't take it.
Swear to God, I gained twenty pounds after I started karate classes. Thought I could eat anything. After five years, I'm testing for black belt, and I'm fatter than hell.
The technical director at our theatre in college had one of those things. He kept it in the spot booth and used to sleep on it during boring shows. The rest of the time I used to hang my coat on it.
Points for at least taking it out of the box?
Haha nice. I've seen that scene before. Glad to know it's a common one. :)
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