One thing I definitely discovered (and loved) in Toronto was that as far as fashion was concerned, the more color the better. It was all about the brights up there in the land of waterfalls and to a budding fashionista, that was a breath of fresh air, considering Miami fashions tend to err on the boring borders of blacks, jeans, and too-tight tops.Of course you have your bright fashions, and then, you have this.
Ay guys... I really hate having to be the evil witch of this episode and put her out there like that, but I just cannot let this sort of behavior go unnoticed. I want to, I do. But I can't. It's not that I have a problem with neon hair or anything, especially if you're in your teens, which this young lady most certainly was. It's just the combination of it all that was ghastly. The dress was two sizes too small, causing her little back fats to just pop out in a jarring manner that said, "Set me free!"
But let's face it, the real dealbreaker here was the hair. I mean, does it really have to match the dress so perfectly? She looks like she belongs in a Disney movie for rejects. I can so see unicorns and rainbows and cotton candy and an evil witch floating about her. Take a peek inside my brain's vision of this.
Happy Monday my kiddies (even if there's only ten minutes left of it).
26 comments:
Dear lord!! What is up with the colors?! Ha ha ha!! One thing is for sure, you will NOT lose her in a crowd... lol
I saw a woman at Mardi Gras with a crocheted black dress on that was so tight on her that her back looked like a ham! It was disturbing. Luckily I'd had a drink so I was somewhat numbed to the experience or I'd still have nightmares.
As Gordita (fatty), I have to want to kill you for putting her out there... BUT AS a Gordita, I know better than to Wear shit that makes my back fat pop out. On the Third Hand (lOL) I have to give her props for being a Gordita and letting it all hang out... WEll I COULD rock that dress WAYYYY better my back is Killer sexy!
I only just started reading your blog, and I don't think it's my usual thing, but you seem to have a peculiarly skewed outlook on things which I find quite appealing. Don't go changing!
LOL!!! You are too funny!!!!! Her hair is quite bright!!!! I think a streak or two of a bright color is cute but going with the whole head is definitely a bit much.
hahah Love it!
I'm officially in love with you.
we have such similar tastes, I mean check out this picture I posted last year
Oi.
That hair is redonk.
'nuff said.
O.
M.
G.
It reminds me of this... http://www.terma-nator.com/images/motivation/gothopotamus-fat-juggalo-icp-demoti.jpg Click on that link at your own risk, btw.
BUAHAHAHAHAHA!
Love the backfat!
Set it free, set it free!
Oh my God you guys are way funnier than all the stuff I post. OMG! Kendahl and Mr. Condescending! Those pictures just made the coffee in my stomach throw up.
Jeannie: There's no way you'll lose her. Like ever.
Michele: That's what it was! I was sober. No wonder I found it so appalling. Had I had a few drinks I would've been dying my hair pink with her.
Curly: It's not her size. It's the choices that she's made. No no no. I'll straightenr her ass out. No doubt!
The Unwashed Mass: I PROMISE I won't change. It's only getting weirder from here. I'm just treading lightly because I don't want to scare you guys away.
Southern Belle: I actually do think a few streaks is cute. Maybe just for fun, you know?
Ella: Ay girl...
Amber: I wanted to set it free. But I was scarred. She looked a little angry. And I've never physically fought anyone before so the odds were for sure against me.
HAHAHA I know what you mean. I think she knwos she's a beach whale so she dyes her hair and wear weird stuff so people will take their attention off her weight!
OMG!! HORRIBLE is all I have to say... lol!
Oh my god, I love this! I really like the rainbow unicorn picture which is exactly what I see when I see this picture anyway.
Around here, in Pennsylvania, I am prepetually surprised by all the women that think tights are suitable pant substitutes when they are NOT thin. Like, I don't need intimate knowledge of the bumps and dips of your thighs.
I particularly enjoy your commentary as well. Keep it up!
I'd love it if you could check my blog out sometime! withmonsters.blogspot.com
listen, being sodomized by a unicorn is no laughing matter. wait, it appears this blog post is not about unicorn sodomy...
dammit, i keep screwing these comments up.
one day, mark my words there will be a glorious post about unicorn sodomy (they are like legos you know?) and i will have my day.
yeah but everyone else's comments are about her size! :( oh well! Love you posts anyways!
Hi Molly! I did check out your blog and commented :) I love your drawings.
Furiousball: My friend! Are you hinting at what I should post about next?
Curly: They love you tooooooo. When are we cooking dinner?
Maybe she changes her hair every time she changes her dress. Or she has a never ending supplies of pink dresses.
The colors. THE COLORS. Oh god. It's like a cotton candy machine threw up on her.
I have a hard enough time not making fun of girls with valley-girl voices whining because their calves are too fat for cute boots. Passing up this opportunity would have been just as impossible for me as it was for you. And I totally give you kudos for matching the bar over her eyes to some of those streaks in her hair!
Whoa!!! This is funny and serious at the same time. This back fat issue is epidemic around these parts.
THERE MUST BE AN INTERVENTION.....AND SOON!!!
Sadako: I'm leaning more towards the never ending supply of pink dresses.
Sono: Yummy I love cotton candy. If I would've been drunk I would've eaten her ass up! Or at least tried until she sucker punched me in the face.
Stephanie: You noticed that didn't you!
Roschelle: Let's call one. The Back Fat Exterminator!
My Mom would have looked at that poor lass and say "you know she's probably unemployed. No one in their right mind would hire her, poor girl." I'm thinking they didn't have rainbow hair in her high school in 1945, lol.
Ahhh I can't believe dressing like that is even legal!
I want that hair. The backfat, not so much.
Leave the poor girl aloneeeeeeeee -=0(
shes just looking for her cool-aid man
Such an easy target...be kind ladies
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